Top 10 Things I’d Say to My Boss (If I’m Brave Enough)

Today I talked back to my boss. Well, a little. I kept my cool as she lashed out at the staff, then she zeroed in on me, short of blaming me for things that I wasn’t really responsible for. Then in front of the others I told her, in an unusual loud voice, that we could not yet refer it because of the incomplete data. I sarcastically pointed out that the paper she was holding does not really tell anything. I shouted at the division chief who happens to be her close friend and demanded her to explain the delay to the boss. I made it clear I would not cover up for her.

Then, I guess, it hit her. My boss realized that I answered back, in a not-so-pleasant way. She stopped. She lowered her voice and tried to set aside her anger. I was ready to clash with her, in front of everyone else (who, I think, are just waiting for me to explode and save them). Seeing her reaction, I also controlled myself. I could have shifted from defensive to offensive position, but again, my pacifist side prevailed. I let it pass.

Now that I think of it, I could have blurted out a minimum of ten things that I’ve been aching to tell her (in a not-so-pleasant way), had I not been able to rein in my emotions. I could have said to her face, in front of everyone, that:

#10. Not because you’re older, you’re wiser. You cannot think out-of-the-box and just follow everything the higher authorities tell you like a loyal dog. You’re old school and you’re a puppet. You’re being such has already caused us a lot of troubles. You were gifted with the brain to think, so just use it and think things out first before you drag us into your quagmire of misconceptions. Your worth can never be measured by your blind obedience.

#9. We have our own lives, too. Our lives do not revolve around the office. Even the people we serve have other priorities aside from work. So give us a break. They take a break. Leaves are our entitlements, our rights. They were provided for by the law so we can take a rest. Let us use them. We need them to enjoy our lives outside of office. And don’t force us to take overtime work unless it’s really needed. Overtime work is actually a measure of inefficiency, because it only means you can’t get your job done within the mandated office hours.

#8.  We have feelings, too. We get hurt by your pointed remarks. We don’t like being shouted at. Especially in front of the others. If you have issues against us, talk to us in private. Respect us. Whatever bad thing you say to our face will forever be in our minds and no amount of sweetness from you can ever erase it. You have to understand us, before you ask us to understand you.

#7. We will not allow our families fall apart like what happened to you, just because you devoted your life to work. You were never our role model on this aspect. Your being a faithful employee made you a boss, but at the expense of your health and your kids. We work for our families. So they can have decent lives. A broken family is not what a decent life means to our children. Our families always come first.

#6. You have a lot of talented subordinates but you don’t allow them to realize their potential. You thwart their growth by depriving them of the much needed training because you are afraid that if they become too good, they’ll learn that what you are doing is not right and they will leave you. This is also the reason why you have kept mediocre personnel under your wing all these years because they will kiss your ass anytime. Let the good ones shine. Let me shine. Try to become less self-centered and we will not get back at you. That’s the only way you can make us feel indebted to you.

#5. Before you attack others’ weaknesses, look at their strengths first. Many of our staff now are demoralized and have lost the drive to perform, because they will only need to commit one mistake and you put them down as if they have not done anything good at all. As if they have never helped you. You are not disciplining them this way, you only make them apathetic and feel useless. It only takes a pat on the back or a smiley on a note to make them feel appreciated.

#4. You are not always right. Being a boss does not make you all-knowing. Listen. You will learn a lot of fresh perspectives if you will only listen. Sometimes their views are more relevant to the times. Worse, you have eternally zipped their mouths shut because you get angry when they try to raise a point. You reject good ideas because you refuse to understand. You dampen their initiatives. You instantly kill them because you don’t agree with them at the outset.

#3. Not because you’re sick, we will always be kind to you. We have been patient with you because you have a medical condition. I am here because I have made it my duty to support you. But I will not support you at the expense of the staff whom I know have always given their tasks their best shot and whom I can always rely on for support. Don’t use your illness as an excuse. One day, you will find yourself unable to appeal to pity, because we got tired of you already.

#2. You will never be good enough so stop trying to please the higher authorities. You try hard to “perfect” our outputs and yet we still get criticized for mediocre and delayed outputs. That’s because you want to do everything your way, even if it’s the wrong way, leaving us with no choice but to just let you do what you want. Because you are so “hands-on” on everything, you cannot attend to other things. Since you are a control-freak and you don’t delegate, you’d rather let other outputs wait until you have time to attend to them. We end up swatting flies all the time because of you.

#1. Do not use God’s name in vain. You only knew about God because you got sick. Not because you have turned into a believer, you become the epitome of what is morally right. We had our faith long before you did and we have our own sense of what is right. You should never impose on us by invoking what you think is the will of God. First and foremost, Christianity taught us to love our neighbors. You have been sorely lacking in this aspect.

If I had the courage to say all these, what could have happened? Well, I know she wouldn’t be able to easily kick me out of work. But I will sure have a negative reputation for lashing out on her. Worse, the staff might take pity on her and side with her, especially since many of the stuff that I’ve been meaning to say are really below-the-belt. It’s a dilemma, really. Should I keep my silence or speak out? For now, I guess, I’d just keep everything here, in this blog.