Losing and Moving On

Okay, so it’s been a while since I’ve last posted. For a while, I thought I was already losing the drive to write again. I’ve been busy with other things. I could not write my thoughts down. Or perhaps, that’s because I was really thoughtless for sometime.

A lot has changed since then. Chief Justice Renato Corona has been evicted from his office, the Celtics lost the chance to enter the finals, Manny Pacquiao was defeated by Tim Bradley in a controversial decision, and we’re having a new boss, according to the news.

Many people have been asking me about my thoughts on the decision of the Impeachment Court against Chief Justice Corona, and all I could say was: the impeachment is essentially a political exercise. I’m not saying that he is guilt-free but what I could say is that the evidence failed to show his guilt beyond reasonable doubt. The only lesson I learned from it is that the constitutional separation of powers in the Philippines is BS. The judiciary is powerless against the whims and caprices of the president and a pork-hungry legislature.

My husband just told me that he learned that the highest number of crocodiles can be found in Isabela, a province in the northeastern Philippines. I said, “no, they’re in the Senate and the House of Representatives.”

But hell, everyone should now move on. Jessica’s fans should do the same and stop bashing Phillip for winning AI. Celtics fans must now support the Oklahoma City Thunder. As for Manny Pacquiao, well, I don’t know. I, and many others, including Floyd Mayweather, think he won that fight. There’s a proper forum for that though.

Speaking of moving on, I’ve also been bothered by confusing events lately that seem to lead me to a reconciliation with my former flame. My mom, who spends her whole day watching TV, suddenly befriended my ex’s mom, making me very uncomfortable seeing her around. Then one day, what I’ve been dreading happened when she asked me: “xxx’s mom said you’re his first girlfriend, is that true?”

For goodness’ sake, they are now talking about us! I knew it. Okay, I know I have lots of episodes of unhappiness, but I begged her to please don’t tell my ex’s mom for fear that my ex would find out. I dumped him with impunity, without no acceptable reason except for my plain foolishness, and I really don’t like the thought of him knowing how much I suffered. Karma? I hate to think of it that way, but it’s highly damned possible.

Last week, I also had a drinking spree with my sis (who is now single because she just separated from her husband) and her friend, who also lives in the neighborhood. Her friend exclaimed, “so you are xxxxx, I heard a lot about you.” So I asked what are the stories about me. Guess what — it’s about my relationships (there were two guys actually, but I really don’t count the other guy) with the boys in the block. As I had drank too much, I think I fed her a lot of information as to why I hit it on and broke up  with them and…gasp…how I regret not really giving my ex a chance! Talk about breaking your silence.

Then just recently, my friends from the village arranged a reunion through facebook. I haven’t really gone out with them since time immemorial, so I thought it would be nice to spend time with them. Since I am not really adept at FB, I clicked “join” thinking that I was only joining the group. I didn’t know it meant joining the event.

Then my ex was joining, and well, after a few days, his wife, too. Suddenly I didn’t know if I would still join. That would be uncomfortable too the max, not that I’m planning to become a homewrecker, but because there was a time that I really wanted to talk to my ex. We never really had a closure back then. We never really became friends before. I don’t even remember hearing him talk back then. I just wanted to chat with him about the weather, his family, and life, in general.

I’ve been thinking for days if I should go. Then the event was cancelled. The coordinator got sick. Looks like divine intervention. I guess there’s the answer to my question.